As the saying goes, everyday should be Parents’ Day. Of course as a child, we don’t realize the full scope of what our parents sacrifice for us on a daily basis. Most parents put their children’s needs and wants before their own and before we know it, they are young adults. We always wonder where the time has gone and hope that we did a good job raising them. However, only our children can truly attest to our efforts.
Our household is very joint, in a couple of ways. I currently serve in the Wisconsin Air National Guard as the Human Resource Advisor to the Madison, Wisconsin-based 115th Fighter Wing and Volk Field Airmen. It is my passion to take care of others in all aspects of my life. My husband, L.J. Maple, is a Wisconsin Army National Guard Drill Sergeant with the Recruit Sustainment Program in Merrill, Wisconsin.
We met 17 years ago in Washington D.C. while L.J. was serving on active duty with the Marine Corps Honor Guard, and I was serving with the Washington D.C. Air National Guard. In 2001 we moved back to Wisconsin, and I transferred units and L.J. transitioned to the Army National Guard.
At that point, we had two small boys, and as all military parents know, life as we knew it would soon change after September, 2001. In our household, we did not both want to be deployed at the same time. It was not best for our family. We made the tough decision that I would deploy and L.J. would separate at the end of his term of service to be at home with the boys.
That didn’t last long. After another break in service L.J. wanted back in, as he too had a passion for helping others. He found it as a drill sergeant. In 2010, we had already been through four deployments. Thankfully we had the support of family. My parents and only brother lived nearby to help L.J. care for our children while I was deployed. Later that year, tragedy struck when my brother was killed in a motorcycle accident. Our household was now growing, as I stepped into my brother’s shoes to become a co-guardian to his two-year-old daughter and four-year-old son.
After another deployment in 2013, and now at 19 years of service, I realized that I missed a collective total of two years of my boys’ lives and more than a year of my niece’s and nephew’s. I also have a greater understanding of being a parent and a true sense of gratitude toward parents, especially my husband. Like many others, he openly accepted two small children into his life with no biological connection and is selflessly parenting them as his own. Not to mention that caring for four children while the other parent is deployed is no easy task. I am forever grateful!
As joint military parents we’re always trying to deconflict our schedules. In addition to serving in the Wisconsin National Guard, we both work full-time and serve the community while spending time with our children. As with so many families, our military values and concepts transfer into civilian life, especially mentoring. As parents, we coach and teach our children in all that we do. From coaching sporting events, volunteering in local community events and simple daily interactions, we find ourselves emulating fundamentals from our own parents.
I know that so many of us recall being in the hangar either pre- or post- deployment and can remember hearing leadership state the importance of our family support system. It is such a true statement that we (Soldiers and Airmen) cannot have a successful mission without the support or our family and friends back home helping to tend to daily family needs. Most of us truly comprehend and appreciate the sacrifices that our spouses make in our absence throughout our military career.
Not only today, but each day, be thankful and keep in mind all that your parents have done for you, all that spouse does to support you and your children, and continue to pay it forward in your parenting each day. Remember to go out and celebrate your family together, make memories and thank your parents and spouse for all of their support throughout the years.
Happy Parents’ Day!